So sad, another left home

The other couch went away today - to sit in someone else's home. They'll enjoy it I know.

I keep telling myself - "It's just stuff."
But I miss it already
and fear that I might not have another
as it took 35 years to get these two.
Don't know whether I have another 35 left in me.
Moving is hard on the heart.

Goodbye, Natuzzie

I sold my sofas today. One left the house not just five minutes ago and I miss it already. I never had a couch - a new couch until these two. My first marriage, we had hand-me-down couches from his younger brother - out in AZ, we had a mattress. Later in AZ, we moved into a friend's house and they left us a couch.

In Pennsylvania - no couch - my bed was in the living room because Joe had the bedroom. In California, my neighbor put out a couch in their back yard that the kids were jumping on and I took it home. Used it until we chopped it up to move.

So enter New Mexico - one year, no couch - just a futon.

Then we went to Costco one day and there were these two couches sitting there - we scooped them up and never saw them again featured at Costco.

I guess what I learned today that it's all just STUFF. All of it. It can all go, but we have each other. I gave the couches up in favor of hope.

Loom shots

Mike took apart my loom today for travel - Pod travel. We are moving to Georgia - we finally sold the house in New Mexico. I am packing like a fiend.

How come when I am packing everything - beads (oh, I have a great design in my head right now), books (I didn't know I had that book - look at those pictures) and altered art materials (oh - that silver bag could look great as a pocket) - I am deluged with ideas?

And two months ago sitting in front of my computer, the beads, books and materials were laughing at me (Nahnah - you can't think of anything to do with all this stuff!). Are you an artist or what?

Missing some days

Well, I cannot reinvent more days - unless I can go back to the island and do all of this over again. I've been packing books - books and more books. I've decided to take a hard line and give most of them to the library. But I am still counting 12 boxes and counting. I might make 20 - but I came here with 48 - starting from a 60+ box total when packing in CA to move to NM. I just can't do this anymore - buy books and then give them away.

I like to read them again and again. Some I bought for research and never got to them.

I take an oath to be more careful with buying books.

I miss you, Daniel.

Selling Things

I just had a birthday and I am moving again. In my years as an adult, I've been making decisions over what stays and what goes for a long time. This past year, I've been looking at items I've wanted to purchase thinking, "Am I willing to move that?

My last move, I donated 22 books of great books - I brought about 40 more books to used book store and got a credit - and donated that to a women's shelter. In my life, I left town with the clothes on my back and my son. I had to leave everything I ever had or created to make our lives safer. I didn't miss my life when I left - I missed my books and my paintings.

So today, I categorized books. I have a pile to keep, to donate and to try to sell on Amazon. Some people came over to buy our keyboard and I let them at the pile of books to donate. It was thrilling to see the young girl pour over the pile in search of dragons and Harry Potter. I gave her the first book of The Dragons of Pern and a set of the Harry Potter books. She even picked out two cook books for her mom. I love kids who read. I was glad she took some.

If anyone pointed to a pile of books and said "Take what you want." I'd be totally happy. she might remember my books and how she got them - and return the favor when she gets older.

ABQ - adios

Not all Rainbows bring luck

That is all I will say.

Happy Birthday to Me!

I'm 63 today! I drew this in 1978 and I almost look like her now!

Sick leave

I was sick for two days. No shots. NO witty comments. I felt rotten.

Showings and showings

I have the drill down pat by now - clean the kitchen, straighten the bedroom, Mike does the vacuuming and sweeping, clean bathroom, clean kitchen.

And get the hell out of there before people arrive. We had two showings today.

Buy my house, so I can get on with my life.

In the mist of time

Our lives - our loves

lost in the path to the future

dissolved in the past

with no hope of

ever being revived again.

A Fine Time Was Had by All

Mike's sisters left today for home - Georgia. We had quite the whirlwind tour - Old Town, Santa Fe, Nob Hill, Sandia Casino, Jemez Dam overlook - and all the sunshine we could handle (well, I burned a little).

Like the sign says - It's a trip!

doing the santa fe trip

We stopped at Jemez Dam and then went to santa fe - was fun. more later

Howling with the wolf

Yes, I did it.

Pain

I have plantar fasciitis and it's really killing me this week. To add to my condition, I fell - so my good leg can't help my bad leg anymore - until these bruises go away. I've always bruised easily and if you saw my right leg and knee right now - you'd be scared. It's kinda pretty - in a weird sort of way - all the purple, red, yellow color on my skin and cellulite.

I am NOT posting a picture. It's embarrasing.

I'm tired

We painted today. No words. Just tired.

Paint Samples

Photo rights belong to its owner. No infringement intended.

It took us forever to agree on a color to paint the trim. Forever - we were about as far apart as you can be - blue - red?

We settled on a blue/gray. More tomorrow. I am tired.

Living

I used to live in California on five acres. We built our own house - lived in the country until the burbs caught up with us - bbqs, dirt bikes, drunken fights and rap were all with a hearable range whereas before we had quiet - coyotes were the loudest.

So when I moved here, I was looking to a fraction of what I experienced and it's been great so far. We live in a quiet neighborhood. I can go outside any time of day and it's quiet.

Sometimes at night, I can hear a native drum "practice." My neighbor has a Harley - lemon yellow - and he goes out and comes in on the weekends. There are dogs in the neighborhood.

Hide Myself Away Day

Your memory is so strong today.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfxqW9QwOSI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uIQp9Dqcrw

In the Now

I don't know how long this lasts

This feeling of drifting

with no interest

with no hope

no investment

in the future

can it be as simple

as just living for today

is that enough

to inspire

to create

to be

Doodle - Eye

I've been doing doodles/Zentangles for awhile now. This is the only picture I took today.

I have a headache. Not feeling very talkative tonight.

Whipped Creme Clouds

I admit taking a blurring tool in Photoshop and messing with the clouds. It's just so much fun - and the New Mexcio sky usually cooperates with providing the bluest blue and the puffiest clouds - and of course - the WIND.

We were watching San Fran news last night and they were sighting problems in the city with 30+ mph winds - HA! Try 60+ mph sustained winds.

Falling

I hate to fall. I can count on one hand the number of times I've fallen as an adult.

I asked Mike to help me get some storage cubes in the garage. He was reaching up and he grabbed the first one. I was in back of him and took the cube.

I turned to put it on the table and caught my left shoe on a piece of wood that was sticking out. I tried to balance myself, but there was nothing to grab onto. I managed to put the cube on the table and tried grabbing the table - but the momentum kept me going - I tripped again with the other foot and I could see the concrete coming up to meet my face. I put my arm out to shield my head and down I went on the concrete floor.

My legs were tangled over each other and all I felt was stinging pain in my arm and ankle. I stayed down there for a moment, testing to see if everything moved. I then sat up, then I got up and felt my knee - apparently, it hit as I went down.

I have bruises on my legs, knees and one elbow. My neck is pretty sore. Ouch time for me.

Nothing was broken - I have a lot of "padding." (read; FAT) It hurts though - i bumped my elbow in the truck today as I was getting the seat belt and it took my breath away. I hate bruises.

Lens be friends

I bought a lens at the same time I bought my camera from Amazon. It's a Tamaron 70-300mm for long distance shots. I have this huge mountain in front of me all day and I like to get some pictures at the top.

So, this lens does not want to work with my Canon Rebel XT. It'll take one shot and the camera freezes, flashing an error 99 - whch means the lens contacts are not making nice with the camera contacts on the mount.

Well, it's on there. I have to switch it off, turn the lens off the mount ever so slightly and then turn it back on again. Forget about manual focusing - it won't do it. The automatic seems to work okay - but then the error 99 pops up every so often - of course right when the sun is setting and a wonderful shot is there for a second.

I did manage to get some really good shots though.

Secrets in the Kitchen

Well, she doesn't talk much, but she keeps secrets. I love this pottery - her braids go down her back and I love her expression. And maybe with some of the meals I come up with, maybe it's better.

My friend back in California bought several of these at a small stand near Folsom Lake. I went back to where she got them and they had moved. So, no deal for me. My friend felt badly and she gave me this one. I had it in my previous house on a stand when you came in the door, but I like her in my kitchen now.

Still rainy and cold today - so it's warm in my kitchen - I am going to make some pumpkin bread.

It's a Storm Day

I woke up and it was raining. It's the first good rain since December 2008. It stopped and the sun came out and then another barrage of clouds rolled in.

When I took this photo, there was sunshine on part of the mountains, raining at my house, snow on the mountain and a thundering clap of thunder sent me back inside.

I enjoy weather - sometimes.

An empty day

Photo: box of nails

I just couldn't get going today. We had a showing this afternoon, so we had to clean the house - and yesterday was so draining - I had nothing left to give today. I went tired, grumpy and then sad.

We got out of the house and I went to Borders to read the new Stampington Magazines. They are so expensive, I preview them before I buy them. No purchases today. I almost fell asleep in the chair (tired part). Mike slept in the car. He was tired too.

Then I went to the big bead store and paid too much for some silver beads - but I needed them for one particular necklace. I hate paying too much - it wrecks my budget (the grumpy part).

Trader Joe's was mobbed because it was Friday - I wouldn't have gone except Mike needed some things. My foot started hurting (sad part). I was so exhausted, I slept in the car on the way back home from Trader Joe's. I didn't want dinner, so Mike made himself something.

I should just go to bed and write off the whole day.

Joe Blackman III 1967-1988

In Memory of Joe - my son, who would have been 42 today, April 9, 2009.

p.s. I could not upload any photos last night - I don't know why, but it seems to work okay today.

In Memory

My picture will not load - will try again later.

Better than a credit card

Now that I have your attention - it's my library card!

I finished Midnight Disease - the need to write. It was really interesting, but I am ready for some fiction again. I made a promise to myself, I'd include one book of non-fiction a month - get the brain back into fact working mode again.

Fiction is my vacation mode - off to other people's lives or other dragon's, sandworms, etc. I don't lke coming back to reality. I think if I make to old age. I'll be content to sit in a big chair, wrapped in a heating blanket, with some snacks nearby and read for the whatever time I have left. Oh, add some hot tea to that too.

Today, I brought home a bonanza! I found two movies I'd like to see again - Fountain and Silverado. I found a big book on the Art of the Maya; three fiction novels, Ender in Exile, A Tale Out of Luck and Suspect. I also have an audio book of Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere.

Camera Woes

Something is batty with my camera, so I am posting one I took yesterday. This art piece is one of my favorites - I took it at Trader Joe's yesterday.

It's a Trader's Day!

It's Monday, so it's Trader's day for us. We collect our list and our canvas bags. We aim the car toward Paseo del Norte and it knows the way from there. We told it not to go to Whole Foods, just Trader Joe's.

I swore I would never ever go shopping on the weekends at Trader's or Whole Foods. The masses really tempt me to start yelling, "You are not the ONLY one in the store. Move it."

I swear they stop their cart in the middle of aisle and walk down a few shelves leaving their cart/kids/balloons blocking everyone's way. I once saw a kid racing around a crowded store and the mother was dazed - well, she didn't tell him NOT to do it when a store employee asked the mother not to let the kid run around like that because she's seen kids fall. The mother took offense and railed about people minding their own business when I piped up and said, "Yep, I've seen it - chipped tooth, bloody lip - sad." She looked at me like I was from Mars and yelled at her kid to get back here. She took his hand and pulled him away from the clerk and me. We chuckled.

Well, back to today - we had some gnocchi for samples. We picked up all our precious foods that we like to eat and popped on home. I drank a small cold bottle of carrot juice on the way home. Yummmmmmmm!

Gifts from the Land

I believe a precious gift I have is the view from my front windows. The Sandia Mountains are wonderful to watch during the day. I am fortunate that my art room also faces the mountains. They provide me with an anchor of serenity and peace when I look at them. There is also life up there - bears, mountain lions, hawks and the humans - hangliding, hikers, photographers and people who work in the museum and cafe at the top.

I took this shot standing outside my front windows. The angle is wacky, but you get the picture.

Bone of Contention

Photos: Before and after

You know those little sighs and disagreements you have with your husband? Well, one of his little "sighs" is the back of my car. When we go grocery shopping, he unloads the bags and put them in the car. He always comments about the box back there and how it takes up room and how is he supposed to make everything fit, yada, yada, yada.

I had the box back there because of all the junk I had all over my car. I used a post office box and put my books, sticks (yes, I collect sticks) and other assorted "stuff." I put it in the back one day and never got around to taking it out.

He is a place for everything and everything has a place to my see it, put it somewhere convenient and forget it.

So today, I went and got the box and distributed said items to where they were supposed to be: my backpack to my art room, the sticks to my art room, books to the bookshelf, cleaned out my water bottle, put away the two bottles of water and the papers went in the trash. I put all the canvas bags in two of my other bags - I do keep them in the car so when we go grocery shopping I can bring them in and save a few cents (and not have to deal with plastic or paper bags).

We'll see his reaction next time. I'm not telling him I cleaned it.

I'm not worried - he'll find something else.

New Rug Day

Today is a new rug day - and a bargain to boot! We went to Sears and JC Penny's - no deals. We went over to Target and I saw a rug - $150 marked down to $37.75!! It's a big area rug - it was perfect - I threw it in my cart - it's a nice brown oriental style.

For my art room, I found a great wool rug - $150 marked down to $129 - here's a picture of the my art room rug. Cool! So today was a rug day!

My gate

Okay - I tried Photostitching - kinda small - but it was fun!! #1 photo

I bought a Southwestern style adobe (not old adobe - the new not so adobe) house. It is a nice newer house with a great view of the mountains. It's a little different than most houses here in that it is painted sage green. Most others are brown - dark and light - with some with a little red in the mix.

Our entrance is in the back. The front of our house faces the mountains and we would have less window room if they built an entrance up front. So you need to drive down the driveway to the circle behind the house - and there is the gate to the patio.

It's my favorite part of the house - maybe because there are vigas (logs), carved supports and canales.

We are considering some blue paint for the gate and around the wood border of the house. It needs paint, so we might as well spruce it up.

It was a wonderful sunny day - with not too much wind - but we were busy with taxes. We were on deductions and medical expenses. And so completes April 2, 2009.

Oh, I did break long enough to write my review/comments on Lost. http://www.iberostar.wordpress.com/

Dust Storm Day

I didn't even bother going out again today - 60+ mph winds - and since NM is made of dust - away it goes. My asthma kicked in with a punch today. Those tiny dust particles must be making it inside somehow. Where's my caulking gun?

Remember that big mountain in front of me? You can barely see an vague outline in all this dust. Note the poor tree on the left - bend!

Silver Wymn

I've always wear jewelry. I never leave home without it. My collection has varied over the years, but mostly it consists of turquoise and natural stone rings. In the 60s, I didn't have a lot of money to spend on jewelry - mostly I traded paintings with my friends for silver rings. I usually wore a necklace too - whether it was small beads or large.

So, now, here is my current collection. I have two bracelets - they are both of the inlay designs from the Hopi Indians. One is a design and the other is the man in the maze design. I have eight rings - a large bird ring with a garnet; another bird design head of a bird on a feather; a turquoise ring from Cerillos, NM; a large shadowbox turquoise rings; an opal ring; a silver design ring (bought from the Folsom Prison gift shop); a light blue turquoise ring. The necklace is one I made of silver charms with some seed beads.

The background is a collage I made for my cube at work - now it's in my art room.

Another Day Inside

It is sunny this afternoon, but the winds are really kicking up the dust and debris. My asthma does not do well on days like this, so I decided to stay in. For my activities in the art room, please see my Art Now! blog.

Today's picture is my fireplace in the living room. It is a feature that made me fall for the house. I had always wanted a Southwestern house and the kiva fireplace looked so inviting in the living room.

Alas, we don't use the living room much. The fireplace is gas-operated, but it sucks the air out of the room like any fireplace - I think we've had a fire in it about four times total in three years.

I hang out in the living room sometimes - sit on the sofa and read. I usually fall asleep on the couch - when I slow down, I fall asleep. Old age I guess - or everyone called me lazy when I was growing up for preferring reading over just about anything - including chores. Odd how a perception of yourself can be formed in your mind by the comments of other people when you are young. I am still reading though, so it can't bother me that much.

We had a typical Pennsylvania brick fireplace in our living room when I grew up. I always wished it was bigger and I didn't mind getting the wood for it - but my parents didn't light it much. It was just a hole on the wall with a dead deer above it (a story for another day).

Sunday, Sunday

Photo: covered tray (used to be black), handmade cards and claywork

Mike is working on the taxes - so I am playing. It's not time for my type of help yet, he tells me. Errr?

Not to question anything, I played yet again today. I thought this is what retirement would mean to me - time to do what I want. I don't apologize for it.

Well this morning I didn't do what I wanted - I cleaned the bathroom, bedroom and kitchen. The vacuum cleaner is still standing in the living room. I got in a drudge mode and I needed out. I have this little system to make the beds, clean the bathroom, etc. I hate it cleaning - I mean with a passion - but it must be done - need the keep the house ready in case someone wants to see it (not in 8 weeks so far). I guess it's hope against hope.

Anywoooo - I popped in some Homicide: Life on the Street DVDs and I had my art mojo workin'.

I finished off the tray - I covered it in handmade paper. It turned out pretty good. I also had the clay stuff from yesterday. I made my weekly cards to Mom and my mother-in-law, Mary. I thought I'd be bold with spring colors.

Today was Clay All Day

I don't rhyme all the time - woops - but today was all about clay. I finally had all my tools gathered: clay, pasta machine, sticks and stuff - and a book from the library for ideas. Well, the project from the book didn't quite go the way I wanted it to - I still need some shape-cutting tools. So I just did my own thing and played.

I had a face form (don't be afraid, Robin - they won't come alive at night and hurt you), so I mixed up some stone-like clay and went to town.

Clay is really funny stuff - you have to condition it - smooth it in your hands until it gets pliable enough to put it in the pasta machine for further conditioning. I had some gold and reddish clay left over from some pendants I made last time - so I used that for a hanging thing - it's too heavy to be a pendant, but I thought I could hang it somewhere.

I made all the shapes and took my oven into the kitchen. Mike was all excited that I was baking something (poor guy) - but then he found out it was clay. He keeps hoping I will turn into a house goddess, but I'm too busy being an art goddess. *grin*

Magic of Nature - March 27, 2009

This scraggly bush sits outside my gate to to patio. In the spring and summer, it is alive and green. Then winter comes to New Mexico, then this bush turns into sticks. Sticks. It gets brown and looks like it's dead. All winter, the sticks had their dried up red buds on them. The branches were old dried sticks.

Last week it was warm. All the buds started coming out - of course, then it snowed last night.

Today, I go outside to photograph some more clouds - and bam - there are green leaves on that old bush - unbelievable. All the plants here in New Mexico have to fight for their lives with the wind, blowing dust, no water and being at 5000+ feet. You gotta give them kudos for just being here.

Project 365 - Photography

Photo: Storm clouds moving on March 26, 2009

Here we go. I am going to take a picture a day for a year - and create art with it. Here are my rules:

1. Take my camera with me if I go out.


2. If I don't go out, I'll take pictures in my home or in my front yard.


3. I will take the pictures over a week's time and make some sort of art with them.


4. Thoughts I have at this moment - stick the photos on a foam board and do art around them.


5. Put the photos on a 4x4 watercolor paper square and design on the fly.

6. Have a lot of fun and not make it a chore - or a groan.

I'll have a journal of my year as it goes on.